Getting to know your coach - Part III

IMG_0074Welcome back from the holiday break!  Today’s topic is the third part of a series of posts intended as a way for you to get to know a little bit about your host (me).  In particular, this series focuses on my essence and survival mechanisms. Who am I being when I’m 100% authentic?  How am I showing up when I am triggered?

The intent of these posts is three-fold: First, to provide you an understanding of how I operate, and what makes me tick.

Second, to share transparently, and vulnerably, as part of my own journey in integrity.

Third, in the hopes that you will take away something for yourself – maybe in the way you choose to show up, or simply recognizing that you are responsible for the day you are having.  If you would like to read the first post in the series, you can do so here.  The second post can be read here.

The third part of my essence is passion.

For many people that know me, this is not a surprise.  It wasn't a surprise for me either.  Passion is an aspect of myself that I engage with easily.  It is also, ironically, an aspect of myself that I often sabotage and lock myself out from based on the way I take on projects.  More on this later.

What is passion to me?  Passion is my drive.  It's the fire that I experience when I am aligned with something that intrigues me, piques my curiosity, and gets me hungry.  And when I'm hungry, I am ravenous.  Once I've got an idea in my head that I want to execute, get out of my way and let me get to it.  Passion is what drives me to continually develop myself and to take on things that scare me.  It's the part of me that can't help but work on a project, because I want so very much to succeed.

When times are tough and I'm struggling to get through things, passion is the part of me that I can engage to pull (not push) myself forward.  Passion is the star in the sky that keeps me moving toward my goal.

So why would I sabotage that?

Naturally I don't ever sabotage myself, nor my essence, intentionally.  Well, I should reword that: I very rarely sabotage myself or my passion with the awareness that that is what I'm doing.  Very rarely do any of us.

Earlier I mentioned that when times are tough and the light around me starts to dim, passion can be the part of myself that pulls me through.  However, things can go a different route.

Sometimes, when things are dark and I'm struggling, my drive leads me to push even harder.  Like someone trying to punch through a wall, rather than take a step back and look at my task (maybe I should be looking for a weak spot in the wall.  Maybe I should go and get a jackhammer), I can simply push myself to punch harder and more furiously.  In these times, I sabotage myself and my essence, replacing the possibility of passion with frustration, stubbornness, anger and resignation.

Hopefully this example serves to illustrate that, while realizing that it is simply a matter of choosing passion instead of those other things, actually having the wherewithal to do so in the moment can be rather difficult.

One of the tools that I use with clients is identifying their overwhelm cycle.  How does it go when they become overwhelmed?  Distinguishing this provides us with ways to identify when we're starting to get into our own furious wall-punching phase, and to short-cut the inevitable frustration to get back to our being.

My invitation to you, for the new year, is to sit down and commit to 30 minutes spent identifying what stokes your fire.  What are you passionate about?  And if you can't think of anything, decide what you will develop a passion for in the new year. (Yes, you can actually develop a passion for something, simply by working at it and improving).  Make a declaration and get committed.  For most people they stop after five minutes of looking at a blank piece of paper.  Don't allow this - commit to spending those 30 minutes.  If it's not coming to you, then start out by writing down everything you've ever been paid to do.  Then write out everything you've ever done for physical activity.  And continue writing until the words come to your mind.  If all else fails, simply start copying pages from a book until the words come to you - trust me, they will.

One final item before we end today: For the month of January, to celebrate the new year, we are providing a promotion at Evergrowth!

If you take a complimentary session with me during the month of January and hire me, the first month will be at half-price.  For existing clients, if you refer someone to me in January that hires me, your next month of coaching will be at half-price.  Share the joy and get committed this year to something new!

Happy holidays!