What is coaching?
- Well, before we explain, let us just say that it's way more fun to experience coaching than to read about it.
- That aside, ultimately, coaching is a partnership with you and a coach, where you get really clear on what you want in life, really clear on what is holding you back, and move those things out of the way. It’s about creating an amazing life — whatever that means for you.
What can I expect to achieve through this process?
- Please see above.
What is ontological coaching? How is it different than a traditional coach?
- First, we’re trained as both ontological and facilitative (what people often call traditional) coaches.
- Second, ontology is a fancy Greek word for "the study of being". What that means for coaching is that we address not just what you’re doing, but also how and who you’re being.
Ah, got it. No, wait, that didn’t help me at all. What the heck does that actually mean?
- Think of it like this: You have something that you perceive as a problem. Maybe you spend too much time at the office and wish you could spend more time at home. From the traditional coaching perspective, we might take a look at what we could put in place that would remind you to go home earlier. Maybe we could set up a consequence if you don’t shut down your computer at 5PM. Maybe we could enlist your co-workers in pushing you out the door. Whatever it is, that solution addresses what you’re doing.
- However, the deeper question is how are you being that is making this a problem? Why is this even a problem in the first place? You say you want to be home with your family, and yet you’re not doing that. There is something deeper at play here.
- Maybe it’s your relationship to work, your relationship to leaving the office at 5PM (maybe you’re worried that people will judge you for leaving early), or something else. That’s what we’re really interested in. All of the actions you take operate out of that underlying belief. If we can shift that foundation, then you’ll experience a shift not only here, but everywhere else in life that that same way of being shows up.
- You can read more about the distinction between doing and being here.
- And, in the eternal wisdom of Captain Jack Sparrow: “The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem."
Why would this type of coaching be right for me?
- That’s for you to decide. One of the things we notice is that people often try to determine the answer to this question before they’ve experienced coaching. Coaching is an experiential process, not an instructional one. (That’s why going and reading ten more tips on productivity isn’t giving you any more time).
- Have a complimentary session with a coach and see if it provides you any value.
How much time is required for coaching? How flexible is scheduling? How much does a coach cost?
- Well, let's slow you down. Certainly, coaching requires an investment of commitment (time and payment being part of that commitment), but you’re putting the cart before the horse a little bit. Looking to weigh benefits and costs to make a decision before you even know what you’re looking for is not the right order of events.
- Remember, coaching is an experience. Let’s have a conversation about you and what you want and go from there.
I've heard it said that your dog is the most handsome and best-dressed dog in all the land. Is this true?
- Yes. He also does our taxes for us.
Can all of my life questions be answered and a new road built in one session?
- No. We really wish that was possible (hey, we work with coaches too and would love the shortcut), but it’s simply not realistic. In your coaching, you are working to unlearn 20+ years of habits that you’ve finessed throughout the course of your maturation into an adult. You’re not going to achieve that in 1 hour, no matter how powerful the conversation. Our clients have bigger dreams than can be created and sustained in one hour.
What do you expect from me?
- That you’re awesome.
- Seriously, though; we love working with awesome people, and that’s part of what we look for in a client. The only other things we expect from you are that you want to create something more in your life than what you currently have, and that you’re open to seeing something you didn’t see before.
What is the process of coaching?
- It is very boring to describe, and very empowering to experience.
- If you’d like a longer description, please re-read the last sentence.
What life areas is it good for?
- The areas where you most want to see yourself crushing it (the ones you really care about).
- Coaching is a tool that will empower you throughout your life. It empowers you to become the best version of yourself possible.
- You get to choose the areas where you make that happen, but when you change the way you’re being (remember, those underlying beliefs), it will create transformation for you everywhere.
Where do we meet?
- On the phone.
On the phone? But I hate talking on the phone!
- Adam does too. Well, he used to. But then he did a lot of work around his relationship to other people and himself and suddenly, the phone stopped being so terrifying.
- The truth is that the phone is the best way to experience coaching. It frees you up from the self-consciousness that Skype, video calls, or meeting in person can create, and it is no less intimate (in fact, it is often more intimate).
Well, I’m different. The phone just doesn’t work for me.
- We understand. We went to the gym and told them lifting weights and no longer eating cookies wouldn’t work for us, and they just laughed.
- Sometimes you just have to trust the process and the experts, and we’re really good at what we do — promise!
What's the difference between executive coaching, business coaching, etc.?
- This is a great question that we see a lot: To answer that, let us tell you a little bit about the coaching industry first. First, coaching has a very low barrier to entry. You could call yourself a coach today and start asking people for money in exchange for your coaching (please don’t). Because of this, there are a lot of people out there calling themselves coaches, when they aren’t doing anything of the sort.
- When people call themselves a business coach, what that usually means is they're a business consultant. They’ve experienced success on their own terms, and can now provide you guidance in creating success that same way. There’s nothing wrong with what those people are doing, and many of them still provide value, but it’s not coaching.
- Coaching is something completely different from consulting. In coaching, there is no advice given. As a coach, we don’t have it that we know better than you — only that sometimes we can see the forest you’re in, when you can only see the trees. We don’t tell you what to do, we work with you to draw out what you already know you need to do.
- A good coach coaches the person — not the situation. It doesn’t matter if you’re working in your career, struggling in a relationship, trying to improve your experience of your family, or something different. The constant in all of those is you. You bring your stuff — your ways of being — into each of those situations. How you are being in one place, is how you’re being in another. Because of that, the distinctions between an executive coach, a business coach, a relationship coach, a quantum coach, a leadership coach or any other type of coach are much less meaningful than whether or not the coach resonates with you.
- The long and short of it is that coaching is coaching, like sugar is sugar: The qualifiers (business, life, executive, wellness, etc) describe the client more than they should describe the coaching. In our opinion, it’s just marketing. In the words of the Dread Pirate Roberts: “Anyone who says differently is selling something."
It doesn't seem very professional to be talking about your dog and posting pictures of him in the middle of your FAQ.
- Well, first of all that isn't a question.
- Second, that's a fair point. It definitely doesn't meet the conventions of professionalism as most people relate to it. The truth is, we're real people, and we think that most real people have had just about enough of pretending they're something they aren't under the guise of being professional.
- If you do any work with us, we'll get to know each other on a deep level, and that is likely to include a story or two about our dog, because we love that little guy an awful lot. Instead of calling ourselves professional and pretending that important things don't matter to us, how about telling us what you really care about?
- Also, look at this little guy! He's amazing!
What is coaching not?
- We see what you did there. You’re a clever one, Padawan. Here’s the short answer: Coaching isn’t consulting or advice giving.
- It isn’t a hierarchical relationship. You’re the expert. You know you better than anyone else. (This is why advice rarely serves to move someone forward).
- It also isn’t therapy. Therapy generally addresses wounds from the past so that you can be present. Trauma and emotional/psychological scars require the skills of a trained therapist. If therapeutic issues come up in a coaching session, a good coach will refer you out to a therapist so that you can heal the past while simultaneously moving forward into a future of your design.
How can I avoid being undressed when we meet?
- Hey, you can wear whatever you want (especially since we’re talking on the phone).
- But seriously, if what you’re worried about is feeling vulnerable, then how’s this: We won’t take you anywhere you’re not comfortable going. You drive the process. If we hit up against something that you don’t want to explore, just say so. You’re the boss.
- While we assert that your deepest fears are what lie in front of achieving your deepest desires, it is always your choice how deep we go.
How do I know you're any good?
- Have a coaching conversation with us and decide for yourself. We could give you our credentials, our background, or point to the work that we’re doing ourselves, but none of that really matters right? You’ll know if we’re a fit after you’ve experienced us.
- If you really want to find out from other people, you can check our testimonials. But isn’t it more fun to find out you love chocolate because you tasted it, than by listening to someone else describe it to you?
Do I need to have a huge goal? What if I am not sure what's next?
- No. Actually, that can be a perfectly good place to come in to coaching from. If you don’t know what’s next, but want to find out, that in itself is a goal. Sometimes, the first part of a coaching relationship is getting clear on what you really want. You are in good company — most people have a hard time identifying what they really want. (Most of us have been raised with the story that it’s selfish to ask for that).
How do I know the time is right to work with a coach?
- When you’re ready to commit to creating the life of your dreams (even if you don’t yet know what that looks like). Not a moment sooner.
- And, we invite you to consider that the time to commit to creating the life of your dreams is right now. Ask Hugh Laurie:
- “It's a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you're ready. I have this feeling now that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There is almost no such thing as ready. There is only now. And you may as well do it now. Generally speaking, now is as good a time as any.”
Do I need to wait until I have a really big problem?
- No. Please don’t, in fact! Our favourite place to start working with people is when they’re already up to big things. Think of it this way: if you multiply the number 5 by 500, you get 2500. But if you come to us when you’re already a 20, you’ll get 10,000.
Have you considered adding your dog as a partner in Evergrowth?
- We had a conversation with him about it, but two sentences in, this is what he did.
How do you guarantee I'll get the results I'm seeking?
- We don’t.
Well, I want to ensure I get good return on my investment in hiring you, what method do you use to prove my ROI?
- You do. You set out what we’re working towards. Every session, we look at that. Are you moving towards it? Are you staying stagnant? Like most things that are worth the effort in life, you will get out of this process what you put in to it.
- What we can guarantee is that we will stand for your greatness, your vision, and your dreams in a way that no one else in your life ever has before (yourself included).
Why do I need a coach?
- You don’t need a coach. Come talk to us when you want one.
But, aren’t you meant to convince me to work with you?
- Nah, that wouldn’t be very fun or interesting for us, and that would be pretty backwards wouldn’t it? Why do you want the stuff you say you want in your life? Why is that important to you? If we want you to have the life of your dreams more than you do, it will make for a terrible coaching relationship. You have to want this.
Do you use any assessment tools?
- No. We have yet to find or experience a standardized assessment tool that provides as powerful and lasting transformation as being coached powerfully.
- In our opinion and personal experience of assessment tools, we’ve found that they can give people a lot of interesting awareness, but awareness alone doesn’t generate any lasting transformation. Learning that we were extroverts or introverts did not empower us to go and have the scary conversation that we had been avoiding.
- We've also noticed that people frequently use their assessment results as a label and a crutch, or excuse, for not doing what frightens them. We’re much more interested in the life that you want to create — and we think you are too.
Well, I met with a coach that really liked assessment tools and thought they were important. Won’t it be easier for me to do the thing that is scary if I know why I’m avoiding it in the first place?
- Maybe, but that’s never been the case for us. Instead, our experience is that people typically hope that if they can figure out why they’re avoiding something, it will become less scary to do it. All this does is keep people in an ongoing cycle of seeking more knowledge and never taking action.
My life is already working pretty well. Why would I want a coach?
- First, congratulations on having a good life! There’s nothing wrong with staying there, and if “pretty well” is what you want, we wouldn’t recommend working with a coach.
- However, if you want an amazing life — a life that exists in the realm of what you currently deem “impossible” — that’s a great reason to work with a coach.
- As Bay says, “The best time to repair your roof is when the sun is shining.” She’s pretty sure she read it somewhere. Waiting until there is a problem is not only unnecessary, but kind of defeats the purpose of having an awesome life. Think of any professional or Olympic athlete: They don’t stop working with a coach when they’re doing well; they get the best coach they can find to push onto the next level.
What kinds of things will you get me to do?
- That’s really for you to tell us. Together with you, we’ll look at what you say you want to create in life, confront you when you make excuses for why you can’t do it, and champion and support you to step up and take on the things that are in the way (and maybe a bit scary). That being said, no one can force you to do those things — you have to want them.
Okay, your dog actually does seem pretty awesome.
- So do you! Let's have a conversation.